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Thursday, April 20, 2006

The Answer to the Question?

Picture this scenario:

A and B are classmates, sitting next to each other. Lately, B are acting strange.

A, thinking B was just in bad mood, occassionally attempt to make small conversation, hoping to cheer B up. However, it has became apparent that B is giving A cold shoulders.

A is wondering what is wrong, but afraid to ask B in case it was just A being over-sensitive. A felt very troubled, not only because A is seeing B more than 8 hours daily, and she really cares for B as a friend.

So... should A:

1) Confront B to discuss this matter? (And perhaps risk worsening the situation?)

2) Keep silent and hope that it's just A silly thoughts?

Sigh~


13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Are you A sehseh?

Anyway, I think it's best to just ask B in a light tone for example: 'hey, are you mad at me or something?' B might deny but if you just ask in a 'not serious' tone, you won't feel embarass when that happen. And trust me, he/she will change their attitude toward you after you ask, they will reevaluate the reason why they're mad at you or explain to you that they're just in a bad mood lately. By take the initiative and ask them what's wrong, you show that you care B and treasure the friendship

Take it from a person who tends to sulk, there's nothing madder than sulking and get ignore by the rest of the world

Anonymous said...

Are you A sehseh?

Anyway, I think it's best to just ask B in a light tone for example: 'hey, are you mad at me or something?' B might deny but if you just ask in a 'not serious' tone, you won't feel embarass when that happen. And trust me, he/she will change their attitude toward you after you ask, they will reevaluate the reason why they're mad at you or explain to you that they're just in a bad mood lately. By take the initiative and ask them what's wrong, you show that you care B and treasure the friendship

Take it from a person who tends to sulk, there's nothing madder than sulking and get ignore by the rest of the world

Funn Lim said...

Why A thinks B is snubbing A? Maybe B just had a bay day and didn't want to talk to anybody anf wants to be left alone. Maybe it is nothing personal. My advice to A is let a few days passand if the situation is still the same, ask B a simple question;

"Oi B! Are you ok?" and don't ask "Why you snubbing me ah?".

Sometimes asking one simple question can solve a whole mystery instead of you .. I mean A thinking all sorts of things,

sehseh said...

Hmm... A has been struggling on the prologue of "Oi, are you ok?" since last week.

Sigh~ maybe A's mind has been running too imaginitive... I'll pass you guys/gal advise to 'A'

;)

alicechen said...

Hmmm thinking of this scene makes me want to laugh so bad because it's almost the same as what actors/actresses do onscreen. hehe

But I agree with Funn Lim. Let wait for a few days.

B is like my friend (a girl) she just had a bad accident and all people can do is ask "Are u ok dear?" she is getting sick and irritating. Maybe try to twist the words aound a bit. Yea please do pass our advices to 'A' sehseh..:P

And sehseh...just go ahead and Pinch them!! HARD PLEASE!

toomanysidesofme said...

Tough situation.
Kinda funny I was in the exact situation in the A spot. I prob took the wrong choice of action, just letting the whole thing just slide because I didn't want to confront it head on. I didn't want to talk about it but I did think about it. Lets just say I got into a really bad mood soon after. Being completely ignored is not a good feeling.

My advice: best thing to do is confront B. Simple "Whats wrong?" will do the trick.

Even though my choice of action was not the best. It took much longer for everything to be normal or at least close to. Things still will never be the same fo me at least... sigh.

Anonymous said...

i think if A has been noticing this sort of behavior in B for awhile... even to the point of thinking for over a week on how to handle the situation, i think the best thing is to talk to B about the situation... something along the lines of, "what's been going on in your life? i haven't had a real conversation with you in days..." and if B insists on ignoring A, then i guess A can only give B some time...

while it is true that B might just not want to talk, i still think expressing A's concern would be better than letting B think A doesn't care, or allowing whatever problem exists to fester. but yeah, i hope things work out with A & B. =)

-hang

Anonymous said...

Agreeing with anonymous suggestion.. "A" should confront B. Not leaving the situation out in the open and have to worry about farther complications in the future. If after trying to confront and B is still acting the same way or has gotten even more upset. Then give B some time to think about the situation or whatever issue that is bothering B. But let B know that A will be there if B is ready to talk or needs someone to talk to.

Hope all is well...Later

Helen said...

I think A should go ask B. If I am mad at someone and ignore him/her, I actually want him or her to make up to me, at least show the initiative to talk to me again. So, probably B is waiting for A to realize the problem and approach B. If, B is not mad at A, and is upset about other things, then A should also go talk to B to show some care and concern. I will be so touched if my friend noticed that I am in a bad mood and care enough to show concern.

But, A should be very careful about the tone when A approach B.

eogpioo said...

Hi sehseh,

Haven't been visiting ur blog for a while. About A&B, how's the progress? There has been so many helpful advice, hope the problem has been resolved. Bye

sehseh said...

I dunno. A said she's a little chickened out. She'll let things slide for this week and observe the situation on Monday.

B's mood very yo-yo like. So A should approach with caution...

Tammy said...

I choose Option One, because a) so much for friendship if the matter, any matter, can't be discussed, b) someone has to take the initiative, and c) might as well get it out in the open if it seems to be bothering everyone.

sereneione said...

From my experience, it is better to ask B about it. I can't tell you how, but who can guarantee that it won't get worse the longer you leave it? Sure, nobody can guarantee that the problem will be solved by asking, but I believe that by asking you have a shot of solving it. If you don't ask, you don't have a shot at all.

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